Well, it had to happen sooner or later. After 3 months of getting to be a stay-at-home mommy and being a domestic diva (my husband has to be laughing right now), it was time to return to work.
Let me just say that maternity leave was all I hoped it would be. It was awesome. The first couple of weeks were the most difficult as I was learning how to be a mom and Chase was learning what it was like to be...well...outside of me. After that, we got in a groove and spent many lazy days, weeks, and months in bed. I watched a lot of Today Show, Dr. Oz, and the Doctors on TV. Early on I watched a lot of Baby Story and Bringing Home Baby to, you know, compare notes with the other new mommies on TV. I spent a lot of time just staring at Chase when he slept just amazed that he was mine. I also did almost everything under the sun trying to make him smile and laugh. There was nothing more amazing than his first smiles. It just lit up his entire face and put tears in my eyes!
On Monday, I needed to return back to work, thus Chase needed to go to daycare. Two weeks ago, we visited the daycare to meet the teacher, drop off diapers, and ask all of our questions. I cried pretty much the entire time during our 30 minute visit, so I knew when I actually had to drop him off for real, it was going to be awful!
Let the cry tally begin...I first started crying after I fed Chase that morning and got him dressed. Back in the "good ole days" we would just chill out in bed and cuddle. Now I had to go put him in his car seat and prepare to be separated from him! Quite a difference. Then I cried as I picked up his carrier and we proceeded to walk to the garage. Then I made it all the way to the center, walked into his room, and as soon as the teacher said "Hey Chase!", I started boo-hoo'ing again. After I dropped him off, I think I had to sit in the parking lot for another 10 minutes crying on the phone with my mom! Now, I've always had separation issues, so this really isn't unusual for me! It's amazing to me that I did as well as I did!
The good news is that Chase appeared to have really enjoyed his first day of "school". When I picked him up, he was lying on a mat staring at baby gym almost in a trance staring at the toy! I walked over to him and tried to get in his eyeline. He stared at me with a blank expression on his face at first and then after a few seconds he smiled. It was so sweet! I got his report card for the day. He ate well, slept just a little, and ended up getting a reputation as a very poopy baby!! Out of the 4 diapers they changed, 3 were dirty! Drew made fun of me saying that the daycare workers are going to start calling me the crying mom with the poopy baby!
By Tuesday however, I didn't cry at all. It's kind of nice getting ready for the day and knowing that you are going to take a shower and brush your teeth before 4pm everyday! I definitely don't see Chase as much anymore and that makes me sad, but it will make me appreciate our time together so much more.
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